Answers to Stated Stupidity

Some general comments and specific objections I’ve heard around the internet, and sometimes, sadly, in person. With answers. Anonymity protects the silly.

Your game reviews are based on hype.

Somewhere in a review I will often mention how a game has reviewed elsewhere, the purpose of a review is to tell you about a game, so why would I do this? Well, my reviews are not based in a vacuum, but in the real world and I expect an informed reader, so I say how well a particular game lives up to the general impression the industry gives. The idea is to weight hype against the actual game, which is nothing like basing a review on hype, quite the opposite.

How can you be objective in a game review, surely you’re talking about how much you liked a game?

Treating a subject objectively is trivial, so long as you understand that treating something objectively is not the same thing as describing an objective reality. Why I even need to point this out is beyond me. Words can have more than one meaning. Obviously I’m talking about how good I think a game is (or how how much I think others would enjoy it), but if I started every sentence with ‘in my opinion’ it would just be hard to read, and obviously I think I’m right, otherwise I wouldn’t hold that opinion.

Wow, Natal (Kinect) looks awesome, why would you even bother with a balance board anymore, you could detect it with Natal?!

Yes, of course, because shape recognition software using a stereoscopic camera system can detect weight-shifting. I’m sure Natal will be lovely, but really, remember what it actually is and how it works.

How can you not like X? How can you say Y about X?

Well, easily. I can’t help answering rhetorical questions, getting upset over it is a bit childish though, don’t you think?

The PS3 has no games.

Yes, still.  I’ll remove it when people who should really know better stop saying it.

I much prefer it when I don’t have to wait five minutes after getting a game home to play it.

This usually lasts about as long as they don’t have the option to install a game, at which point they will.  There’s a reason the PC has had game installations for many years and it’s an oddity of consoles that this doesn’t happen as often.  Let’s put it this way, you’ll be playing a game for, usually, in excess of eight hours, for the first five minutes it’ll install. The hard drive can be approximately seventy times faster than the optical drive.  The loading time saved by using the (much!) faster hard drive is greater than the initial install.

Play game at night with headphones.

This is allegedly a response to something not being scary. It isn’t. Playing at night will sometimes enhance the atmosphere, but it will not create it, and playing a scary game in the daytime, it’ll still be scary, although perhaps not as much. And Headphones. I mean, I get the idea, it’s to cut out the outside world and make sure you can catch the smallest sounds. On the other hand, a good sound system will do that anyhow, and cheap headphones won’t.

Silent Hill 4 wasn’t even supposed to be a Silent Hill game, they just stuck the title on at the end of development.

Let’s pretend that’s what happened (it didn’t, at all).

So what? That would be a really stupid reason to dislike a game. If they hadn’t, and it was a Team Silent horror game called Room 302 with no connection to Silent Hill would it play better? Whether or not it was originally conceived as Silent Hill is not important. Let’s say that it is true that Silent Hill 4: The Room started off as a spin-off, then surely its promotion to the main series is actually a point in its favour.

One thought on “Answers to Stated Stupidity

  1. Pingback: Favourite Silent Hill Game | Peter Reviews

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