Assassin’s Creed: Revelations – Short Review

PRESS L3 to use EAGLE SENSE and LOCATE your target in GOLD

You know those people who harp on about gameplay as if it’s the only thing that determines whether or not a game is any good? Can you hear them in your head right now? Claiming that the graphics don’t matter, it’s the gameplay that counts, story can be great or terrible, but if the gameplay is good, then it can still be a great game? Assassin’s Creed: Revelations is the game these people should be forced to play (that and text adventures), because gameplay is pretty much the only thing it has going for it (well, actually the graphics and score are hardly shabby, but we’ve seen it all before), and is the main reason why this is, unfortunately the worst Assassin’s Creed I’ve played. If you thought Brotherhood was pushing the boundaries of having a light story, then let it be known that Revelations is worse in every respect.
Continue reading

Year’s End 2011

Well, what a year it has been. Nothing, then stuff, then a lot of nothing, then lots of stuff again. The release schedule of games I’m interested in is always weird, but that’s the way it works when we have seasonal spikes and troughs.

Last year of course, I said I was looking forward to Agent, a new Silent Hill game, and Mirror’s Edge 2. Well, that worked out well. Continue reading

Skyrim – Infinite Dragons

The Games Media have been positively ecstatic about dragons in the run-up to the release of Skyrim, breathlessly reporting how there will be infinite dragons, how they’ll be able to attack you almost anywhere.

Hang on though, aren’t we just talking about infinitely re-spawning enemies who stick themselves in the game where you least expect it? I thought infinite baddy respawners were bad unless they were limited to a location where you expect respawning?

Imagine you’re sitting in your car trying to get to your College of Magic and your mobile / cell goes off, so you answer it. “Cousin”, comes the accented voice from the tinny speaker of the expensively crap ‘phone, “we should go to a gentleman’s club”. Then Roman Bellic flies in, crushes half the Liberty City rush hour traffic, belches – engulfing you in flame and kills you dead. Continue reading

Silent Hill HD Collection

The upcoming Silent Hill HD Collection is not really a collection, nor much of an HD Collection. Bundling two games together used to be called a … well, bundle. Collections generally consist of all games in a particular series, but sometimes a subset instead. However, Silent Hill HD Collection contains only two games, Silent Hill 2 & 3. It isn’t a collection of Silent Hill games, since it doesn’t contain any of the newest games. It isn’t a collection of Team Silent games since it doesn’t contain the original Silent Hill. Nor is it even a collection of PS2-era, Team Silent, Silent Hill games, since it doesn’t include Silent Hill 4. Regardless of how people feel about any of these games, a collection should contain them. Continue reading

Warhammer 40k – Space Marine

This is a first impression based off the Playstation and Windows versions of the demo that I played.

There are two sections to play here; The Inquisitor, and Battlements. The Inquisitor is a quite long section where you and your Space Marine brethren do battle against the green tide of Orks, whereas Battlements is quite short, and has your character wearing a jump pack and you doing slam attacks into the ground at high speed. The funny thing is that Battlements is more like the demo I was expecting in terms of length, with lots of demos being vanishingly short. Continue reading

Warhammer 40k – Kill Team

I used to play Epic (which came in a boxed set called Space Marine that contained Eldar and Orks as well as Space Marines, just to confuse you) when I was a lot younger, and I’ve always had a soft spot for the Warhammer 40k universe. I’m sure other people who grew up with excellent Games Workshop stuff know what I mean, generally when you mention games like Talisman, Space Marine, Hero Quest, Space Hulk, and Warhammer 40k itself, people get this wistful look in their eye. Continue reading


Oh no, the FOV has changed!!! Aaaaiiiiiiiiiii!

F3AR isn’t a very scary game.

FEAR has always been about blurring the line betwixt horror and action, being both a competent shooter with smart AI, and full of delicious horror atmosphere. As well as having some interesting characterisations and characters. Those characters kind of make a come-back in F3AR. By kind of, I mean they have a character called Point Man, who has never really been seen before, and who has a beard? Who knew? Continue reading

Dynasty Warriors 7

The best thing to come out for quite a while.

High Quality Video Lo-fi Version

Yeah, I would put this above other far more popular and critically acclaimed series’. This is a game I have played and thoroughly enjoyed for a large period of time, a game I paid almost full price for and didn’t feel ripped off. That’s what matters, that’s what makes a good game. Continue reading

Dead Space 2

There are many problems with this game.

It’s a completely superfluous sequel which makes the first game’s absolutely complete story slightly poorer by redoing bits we liked (why does my girlfriend look nothing like she did in the first game? – why does the silent protagonist keep talking?). It’s far less scary due an unfortunate difficulty curve. Continue reading